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Formula One -Derland: Australia & Malaysia 2013

by Jamie Sanford on April 16, 2013

Click here for all Formula One-related posts on JamieSanford.com.

I totally fell off of my Formula One posts after Italy last year. I’m going to make it another goal to complete them all this year – to do so, I’m going to mostly stick to image commenting, and leave the real recaps up to the fine people that update the Formula One wiki.

Australia

All photos of the Australia race are from Planet F1. Go here to see their whole gallery and enjoy the site in general.

A new season starts with Sebastian “Team? What’s that mean?” Vettel on pole, which is standard. We did get our first glimpse of Lewis “Swag Party” Hamilton as a Mercedes driver, which I think now (a few races in), he sees as an amazing decision.

Last season troublemaker Pastor “Is Going To Run Into You” Maldonado crashed out, and called the car “undriveable.”

After a mostly unremarkable race, Kimi “Is Devoid of Emotion” Raikkonen won.

Final results were Raikkonen, Vettel, and my boy Fernando “Eyebrows” Alonso in third. Clearly Fernando had his eyebrows waxed before the grand prix.

I find it surprising that someone with such triumphant eyebrows has randomness in his facial hair. I’m sorry Fernando, I don’t think it is going to grow in.

Malaysia

All photos of the Malaysia race are from Planet F1. Go here to see their whole gallery and enjoy the site in general.

Yay! Fernando and his eyebrows celebrate his 200th race!

Fernando didn’t get too far in the race (and ruined my fantasy score) by making a really bad decision to not pit after a collision. His front wing was a mess, and soon after passing the pit entrance, it disintegrated in a spectacular fashion. Race over for Fernando.

“Oh, Jamie is going to be so pissed! I hope she forgives me.”

The race moves along well, and Mark “Who Has Absolutely No Luck” Webber is in the lead, with teammate Vettel behind him. They are both given the message to slow down, conserve fuel and tire life to get to the end of the race and earn valuable points for the team, but Vettel had other plans. In this photo, you see Vettel going around Webber, who eventually had to pull away to avoid a collision, leaving Vettel to win the race. (I have never been a big fan of Vettel, but his unsportsmanlike behavior is hideous. I’m even more grossed out by the fact that he keeps telling different versions of how he feels about the situation. Hey Sebastian – you were a douche, maybe better to not talk about it anymore.)

Webber then gives Vettel the finger, which is totally what I would have done. Where was the team radio transmission of what I am SURE was him screaming all sorts of WTF at the team?

Meanwhile, the 2 Mercedes teammates were also given orders to stay their positions and managed to do so without incident. Classy Lewis Hamilton ended up with the podium spot, and mentioned that he thought it should have been his teammate up there.

Ugh. I know that is your thing, but when you know you took the shitty road to get there, maybe try not to gloat about it?

Awkward.

So that’s all for this post. I’ll be back with comments and a bit of recap on China and Bahrain soon!

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Formula One -derland: Belgium and Italy

by Jamie Sanford on September 20, 2012

Click here for all Formula One-related posts on JamieSanford.com.

After the brutally long break, which is just long enough to make me crazy, we got to start the season in Spa!

Belgium (Circuit de Spa-Francorchamps in Spa, Belgium)

(Photo from Planet F1 – check out their gallery here)

Way to restart the season with a big CF. (That’s clusterf*ck, if you didn’t know.) After all of the buildup and waiting during the break, Romain Grosjean of team Lotus went a little nuts during the start of the race and ended up causing a huge accident by first hitting Lewis Hamilton of McLaren Mercedes, who lost control and veered, and Grosjean’s car ended up flying over the front of Ferrari’s Fernando “Eyebrows” Alonso‘s car, which was really terrifying for everyone. The damage was a big hot mess, but luckily, everyone walked away without injury.

I’m having embedding issues but you can see a gif of the action from Alonso’s onboard camera here.

MEANWHILE, my boy Jenson Button of McLaren Mercedes had scored himself pole position, an amazing spot to be in when everything is hitting the fan behind you. The safety car was deployed for a few laps after the big crash on the first turn, and Jenson had maintained his position. Red Bull’s Sebastian Vettel avoided the melee and ended up moving into 2nd from 10th on the grid, Iceman Kimi Räikkönen was 3rd for Lotus, and making me more nervous than ever for Paul di Resta was Nico Hulkenberg, finishing 4th for Sahara Force India.

(Photo from Planet F1 – check out their gallery here)

Jenson celebrates with the team and his girlfriend Jessica Michibata, who is gorgeous, naturally. Lewis is actually half smiling in the back there, having maybe had some time to calm down from being screwed out of the race.

Italy (Autodromo Nazionale Monza in Monza, Italy)

Crazy Italian fan time!

(Photo from Planet F1 – check out their gallery here)

The Italians LOVE Formula One racing, but they love Ferrari even more. It is so enjoyable to see the fans watching, because they are not shy about their feelings and react aggressively to pretty much everything. I love fans in Monza, they make great TV.

The weekend looked really good for McLaren Mercedes with Lewis Hamilton on pole and Jenson Button right behind him. I love both British drivers, but have a bigger soft spot for Jenson and would have loved to seen him take back-to-back races after winning in Spa. Felipe “Felipe Baby” Massa qualified third, far ahead of his Ferrari teammate Eyebrows Alonso, who had a roll bar issue that put him in 10th at the start. I had high hopes too for Paul di Resta, who qualified 4th, with a grid drop to 9th because of a gearbox change. However, I was hoping the speed he demonstrated during qualifying would be helpful during the race. Meanwhile, Romain Grosjean was out on a suspension for casusing the big mess in Spa, and Pastor “Is Going To Run Into You” Maldonado of Williams (who I really hope are looking to get rid of him)was paying the price for douchiness with a 10-spot penalty for RUNNING INTO EVERYONE LIKE ALL OF THE TIME.

The race was lead almost entirely by Lewis Hamilton, who had a nice lead for the most part, even when Sergio “Checo” Perez (that’s his real nickname, I did not make that one up) of Sauber was surging ahead to catch him. Tragically, Jenson Button’s car died mid-race, and I literally had tears because I was so excited that he was going to score more points towards the championship. Naturally, Jenson got out of the car and waved to the Italian fans and was generally amazing and classy as usual. In other news, Eyebrows came from behind to wind up the race in 3rd, helped along by retirements of Jenson Button, and the 2 Red Bulls. Lewis Hamilton managed to hop over 2 drivers in the championship standings because they did not finish the race, and is now just behind Fernando Alonso.

(Photo from Planet F1 – check out their gallery here)

I was totally happy for Lewis, and definitely happy for the Italian fans who got to have at least one Ferrari driver on the podium.

Fernando stayed on the podium long after the ceremony was over, and randomly took a turn at running a TV camera. How can you say no to that bone structure and the eyebrows?

Singapore is this weekend. NIGHT RACE!

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At this time last year, my husband told me that he wanted to watch Formula One Racing with me (he had previously watched it while growing up). I begrudgingly agreed, figuring that I would hang out on the couch and either read or spend time with my laptop. Little did I know that I would become OBSESSED with the sport.

Hello, my name is Jamie, and I am addicted to Formula One. (HI JAMIE!) I think about chicanes and slipstreams when I’m driving my late 90s sedan.

So, in celebration of the beginning of the 2012 F1 Season (the Australian Grand Prix takes place this coming Sunday), I will list my top 5 favorite things about Formula One.

1. Location, location, location.

(Image from BBC Sport Website)

Formula One races take place all over the world, and some of the locations are super swanky. The most obvious of this is The Grand Prix of Monaco, which takes place in Monte Carlo. (Side note: Many F1 drivers make their home in Monaco as it is a known tax haven.)  Bernie Ecclestone apparently LOVES a race with a view, which explains why 2013’s Grand Prix of America will take place with NYC as the background. (More on that later.)

2. Aesthetics & Impressive Design.

In a sport where sponsors are KING, the branding could be a hot mess. While I do sometimes wish there were fewer logos, I think that for the most part, the cars look pretty amazing. I do think that teams Red Bull and Toro Rosso need to figure out a way to differentiate their cars, though, because a blur of red and blue is hard to distinguish on a car taking a corner at 140 mph.

Similar, right? Image from F1Technical.com.

In addition to just the aesthetics, the actual design that goes into a Formula One car is ASTOUNDING. The slightest changes in design can mean fractions of seconds shaved off of a lap time, and it means everything when pole position is often determined in those fractions. I cannot recommend enough this amazing episode of Megafactories from National Geographic, in which we are taken on a tour of the Williams factory.

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It is amazing, and you get a taste of the development of new car components.

3. Drivers.

Jenson Button and Lewis Hamilton, drivers for McClaren. Photo via BBC News.

Yes, there are a lot of hot Formula One drivers, and no one minds that. However, for the most part, the drivers are classy and accessible, which is not something I’m used to as a fan of things like pop stars. It’s not like there’s a news crew backstage right before Britney goes onstage to ask how she’s feeling about the show, and that is EXACTLY what happens on the grid before each F1 race. Reporters running around all over the place talking to drivers, and while not ALL drivers are into this (Lewis Hamilton will not talk to the press on the grid, and other drivers only do scheduled interviews on the grid), Jenson Button seems to be assaulted by someone on his way to the grid for every race, but is always graceful and accommodating.

Sebastian Vettel was the 2010 and 2011 World Champion and is Red Bull’s number 1 driver, as you can tell by his gesture. Mark Webber is the number 2 driver, and doesn’t seem too thrilled about it. Image via the Telegraph.co.uk.

Regardless of said classiness – there is no lack of drama. Shady moves on the track happen during every race! It gets more interesting once you see that the same drivers keep coming together. In addition, each team has 2 drivers, and the drivers are billed as number 1 and number 2. While the ultimate goal should be to move the team forward, it seems obvious that the drivers all want to be number 1.

PS – A lot of the drivers are on Twitter. You should find and follow them. Especially Paul Di Resta, because I am a big fan.

4. The Grand Prix of America.

(Image via Sports Illustrated)

Early into the 2011 season, I decided that my husband and I would travel to Montreal for the Canadian Grand Prix in June 2012. Then, in October, I obviously proved the power of the Law of Attraction, because it was announced that starting in June 2013, a Grand Prix will be held in Weekhawken and West New York, NJ, with NYC as the backdrop. This is about 10 minutes from where I live now, so I am skipping the Canadian Grand Prix and saving my pennies for the inevitably hella expensive grandstand tickets.

In addition, if anyone working on the Grand Prix of America needs someone to manage marketing and social media for the race, I am definitely available. My email address is in the right column.

5. The racing!

(Image via F1 Fanatic)

Obviously, my favorite thing about Formula One has to be the actual racing!

They are crazy fast of course, and the competition between the teams, as well as insane driver skill, make for lots of gasp-inducing moments.  Add to this the technological shenanigans (such as the Kinetic Energy Recovery System or KERS, and the Drag Reduction System or DRS) and it makes for a really interesting and exciting event.

Here’s a video explaining what DRS and KERS are and how they work.

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During the off-season, I’ve taken the opportunity to go back and watch the races from 2010. I am so glad that I did, because the 2011 season was less interesting than 2010, as Sebastian Vettel was incredibly dominant throughout the season. However, 2010 was full of crazy passing at the front of the pack! I have high hopes that changes to the cars for the 2012 season will mean more variety in the podiums, especially because I wasn’t able to pick only top teams in my F1 fantasy league (yes, I just copped to fantasy F1).

So, there you have it. I have never really cared about sports, but I am so excited that I was introduced to Formula One because I really get so much enjoyment out of it.

Does anyone else like F1? Let me know what your favorite thing about F1 is in the comments.

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Montell Williams’ Juicer.

by Jamie Sanford on October 20, 2010

Hmmmm.

Why should I be getting a juicer from famed talkshow host Montell Williams?

…yeah I don’t know either.

It looks pretty legit though.

Product description:

Take a step toward better health and wellness with the HealthMaster fruit and vegetable emulsifier from Montel Williams. With its strong 1200 watt, 2HP motor and commercial-grade, stainless steel blades, this powerful pulverizer has the strength to liquefy whole fruits, vegetables, and leafy greens in just minutes–while still retaining the vitamins, minerals, nutrients, antioxidants, and phytonutrients.

It makes a great shake–but it’s not just for drinks! In addition to being able to make your favorite juices and power smoothies with ease, this high-speed emulsifier can be used to make all-natural baby foods, salad dressings, frozen desserts, and more–you can even use it to mix ingredients for cupcakes, muffins, pizza dough, and breads. You’ll have fun experimenting–there’s 318 recipes in the included cookbook to try.

Hot, healthy foods–it makes them too. Using centrifugal friction, the HealthMaster naturally cooks foods into hearty, robust soups right in the carafe. And, it does it without stripping away important nutrients like boiling can. Your hot foods will be just as healthful as raw foods–now that’s something you’ll really warm up to.

Ready to try it for yourself? Choose your favorite color and get ready to create and taste the healthiest foods of your life. Once you have the HealthMaster Emulsifier in your kitchen, you’ll wonder what you ever did without it.

The Montell Williams Juicer HealthMaster Emulsifier is available from QVC for $164.52.

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